Just Wish I could Tell YOU
by Breyton2009
Summary: Breyton story will continue if you want me too. Not good at summaries so just read and find out what its about.
1. Changes

A/N: This idea has nothing to do with one tree hill storyline at all. How I came about writing this is from the book I am currently writing and figuring I would use it for Peyton/Brooke story. Not sure how or what will happen but its going to deal with a lot. I hope its okay and enjoy! Okay wait so some stuff will be familiar to One tree Hill but I am going to write it the way it should be or at least try too. Sorry if it sucks!

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters they belong to Mark but if I did own them well one tree hill will be different than it is now.

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_Part One_

_In that time we adjust to those changes that's handed to us during the years we weren't ready for._

_Do we fear the change because of what it may cause?_

_Fear of change can be taken to whatever level you need it to go. Which means just how far how you're willing to go defying any kind of change at all._

_Against all odds we seek and conquer the fear. The fear that we thought we could never get passed but we did. Change is what we needed all along but it has to be you and you alone to make it happen._

_Being who you are isn't as easy for you anymore. You lost yourself over the years now your trying to figure out just exactly who you were before the change. Loosing all hope telling yourself this is the person you have always been, right?_

_Wrong._

_This isn't who you have been all your life. Would you like what you find or would it be the thing you have been looking for? To find who you once were can be a long complicated journey because maybe just maybe there are reasons why your not that person anymore._

_Darkness of one's mind bringing out a rebellion against what you fought so hard for. You jump in believing this is the right thing to do. Turning your back against the people that brought you to this 'change' blaming them for everything. Hate and anger thrive in you to do the unthinkable driving away everybody till your just left completely alone sulking in your own mess. Did you mean for this to happen? Probably not intentionally but your filled with all this hurt, pain and anger that your just not caring about who gets hurt in the process. You pray that one day this will all get better. You feel maybe happiness for you can never happen…that the only thing your allowed to feel is that pain you have built over the years. In that very moment as you look in the mirror you see a person you don't recognize anymore. You know that it is you but your different. Looking into your own green eyes all you see is cold and emptiness with no feelings whatsoever. Realizing just how cold you have become with nobody there for you at all knowing that you have to change. Its not for them but its for you something you have ignored because it was always about satisfying what the others want and not what you want. _

_You try to remember the days where it all made sense. The times where you cared about others instead of just yourself. You always knew what could or would happen next. You also had friends who had your back._

_Now your alone. No friends just yourself just like you wanted. Maybe its not exactly what you were going for but now you have to deal with it._

_Your former friends watch you from a distance. Even after the realization that you needed to change you slam on the brakes doing a U-turn telling yourself if they can't accept what you've become they weren't friends of yours anyways. Change is further from your mind now and yet you know deep down you need that help from them. Yes you refuse it over and over again. Why? You already know the answer to it as it breaks you even more pulling you more into the darkness you have been smothered in over the years. Have they lost you forever? Your back remains turned and soon the faces of your former friends soon fades away. And soon they will hate you and hope you rot in hell or even worse wish you death._

_Frustrated at yourself telling your mind this is your punishment._

_Your weak. Misery oh sweet misery oh hail the queen of misery. Be seen or will you stay out of sight so nobody will see the pathetic weak person that is you._

_But your strong how the hell did you get so weak? Your so much better than this. Nobody knows you anymore. You don't even know yourself either._

_Broken, shattered little you. Poor you its always been about you hasn't it?_

_Selfish little bitch open up your fucking eyes. Your going to loose at your own game. You've been so wrapped up in trying to push everyone away yet did you ever wonder what you would do if they never come back at all._

_You missed them didn't you? Have you totally lost your mind? Some say your just a cold hearted bitch with no feelings._

_Standing face to face with yourself. You feel disgusted seeing someone you don't even want to be anymore. Is it finally safe to say your ready to change putting everything behind you where it should stay? Will you let yourself be better than what you have been? Can you forgive yourself?_

_To fear that change like you have done you will loose a lot more than you expected. Don't be afraid to change because in life as you grow up sometimes you just have too. You just have to let go of the fear. Its time to let go._

_People Always Leave._

_You live knowing full well someday your going to die. We don't know when, how, why, where, etc. Does that scare you? Who will miss you? What kind of legacy will you leave behind? Who is not going to miss you? Questions after questions just curious as to how, who, where, why you die._

_A few people in your life dies. You feel sad knowing you won't ever see them again. You don't let people see the tears because you would feel like a sissy or even a wimp. When nobody is looking that's when you feel its alright to cry. Ashamed to be caught with a tear stricken face you wipe your face off with soap and water. Sadness is a common thing when someone you care about and love dies._

_Isolated in a place nobody can find you. You go there everyday to think just to get away from everyday reality. This is your escape from facing the shit you don't want to deal with._

_Music._

_You listen to the words usually with the first few notes you can tell if the song will be good or not. It will say how you feel depending on what kind of mood your in. Its important to you to let the other person know just what it is your going through. They might not understand it but in due time they will, maybe. Music is the escape from life as we know it so we lay here by ourselves listening to the music…listening to the words. They really mean something to you as the words flow out so powerful to the ears you embrace them ever so tightly. When things get really bad music is something you can always count on without judging you._

_You have this best friend that has been by your side through about everything. This person became someone you can turn too letting out the real you. Sure there are some things about yourself they don't quite understand but they try…still accepting who you are._

_Friendship between two people entrusting one another with each other's secrets, desires, bad habits, future plans, etc. It stays between you both not letting anyone else into this little bond you both share so deeply. Nobody really understands this because they can't or they won't understand it. You wonder how lucky you got by having such a great friend. You wonder if it'll always be this way. Will you grow apart and make new best friends pops into your head now._

_Surely you will because people do come in and out of your life. You may make new friends but will they ever get to know you like her? She knows you very well and vice versa. Your scared to loose her as a friend because there might be someone better._

_As you grow up you will meet so many people. Some may totally hate you or they will totally love you. You hate when they have to go but there are reasons why they can't stay._

_Will they ever return?_

_You hope so._

_The ones who stay are meant to be in our lives to guide us in a way or better yet protect us. Your grateful for them because in a way they helped you be a better person. They helped you understand yourself better in ways you never thought possible._

_Friends are family especially if your family is never around._

_*************************************************_

_~New York~_

_**You.**_

_**It has always been you. You've been my best friend but somewhere along the way I developed these feelings of more than friendship kind. I guess its always been there but I was too busy with life, boys, clothes to even care what the hell my heart was telling me. Now its too late because she is gone. Okay not dead gone but it feels that way. This is Peyton Sawyer of all people! My best friend for over ten years! Right I am not in love with her I can't be. Sure we have been very close, share inside jokes, we can be touchy feely. That's what best friends do right? Okay so maybe I have thought about kissing her maybe even more. I get butterflies every time we get close and my god when she hugs me her scent is so intoxicating. Who am I kidding I have it bad…I want to do things to her that a friend shouldn't think about doing to her best friend.**_

**Victoria strolls into Brooke's office. It was back to reality…back to dealing with Bitchtoria.**

"**Snap out of it and get your ass to work. This is no time for daydreaming. This is about work…your clothing line."**

**Brooke rolls her eyes. "Victoria what the hell? Aren't you supposed to be in a meeting?"**

"**I am on my way there now. Just came to check on you see how you are doing?"**

"**Awe how nice Victoria playing nice. I'm just fine just working on the next best thing." Brooke says sarcastically with her infamous grin at her so called mother.**

**Victoria looked annoyed just smiling at her daughter. "Get your shit together because this is what you wanted remember that?"**

_**This is my life now I have to accept that. She was right this life is what I wanted. After all I am living my dream but why did Victoria even care if I was doing okay. Its none of her business. She has never bothered with me but oh yeah we're in business god forbid I screw it up for her.**_

_**~Over in Los Angeles ~**_

_**Assistant to the assistant? I know more about music than any of these people. I have to get their coffee, what they want to eat. Seriously what do you think I am? Oh right assistant to the assistant also known as their little bitch. Yeah I can do better but damn it this is LA if they need me to get dirty just to get a higher position well damn it I will. This is my dream and I will do anything to make it happen.**_

_**John walks into his nice office where he sees Peyton sitting there in his chair looking out the window. The view was nice except for the fact it was really high looking down. Peyton immediately got up realizing John had been standing there watching her with the look of 'what the hell are you sitting in my chair?'**_

"**Sorry um I'll leave now."**

"**Before you leave Peyton if you want to sit in this office you might want to unbuttoned a few more buttons." John says with a wink bringing his feet on his desk.**

_**Peyton walks away in disgust. She didn't know why she put up with all this crap. If Brooke knew what she was doing she would say Peyton is better than this. Peyton looked down at her buttoned up white blouse doing as John said walking back into the office with the fakest smile on her face.**_

"**Better?" Peyton asked sarcastically. "I have a few new bands I think you should really listen too."**

**John glances her up and down. "When you start wearing short skirts we'll talk about those bands."**

_**What an ass really that's what John is. This is my life now but I miss my best friend. Usually this is where I would call her asking what I should do but I can't. I have to do this on my own…I will be just fine. I can do this I don't need Brooke. Sure I miss her maybe more than I should. Wait stop this right now she is Brooke Davis for gods sake. She is your friend…and only your friend.**_

_**Peyton sighs walking into the store. She smiled seeing that Brooke's fashion line has made it all the way to the west coast.**_

***good for you Brooke Davis.* Peyton thought to herself smiling as she purchased her outfit. "I can't believe I'm doing this." She said out loud to nobody.**

_**to be continued...hmm what is going to happen next?**_


	2. I miss my best friend

A/N: thank you for the reviews. I am going to update yet again for this story. I hope you enjoy! Thank you for reading!

Part 2

_**Are you really happy? You ask yourself.**_

_**Your mind draws a blank. You have a cloud of confusion because with the way things are going is great. Which makes yourself happy shouldn't it?**_

_**You don't want to answer. Your happy end of story. That is what you let people think but really your not. How is it that you put on a smile pretending to be happy? Don't you want to feel real happiness? You shouldn't just settle just because you feel there isn't anything better. Follow your damn heart regardless if people approve or not. This is about your happiness not theirs. Just because they're afraid to feel that love you've found doesn't mean you have to do the same. You can love whoever you want your heart will do the rest.**_

_**Do you believe in Fate?**_

_**That person you're meant to be with could be right under your nose. Fate can be one wild ride like a long journey that you just sit and wait seeing what will be will be.**_

_**Cliché saying 'Everything happens for a reason' is not believed by everyone but most do. I am one of them that goes by this cliché phrase. Well not all the time but stuff that should happen will happen through a series of events.**_

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HOW'VE YOU BEEN?

_Brooke met up with Lindsey for lunch to check in on what's going on with Lucas's second book. They have known each other for awhile now…she introduced Lindsey to Lucas. It turned out she was an editor so Lindsey took a chance on Lucas with his books. Soon after the two began dating leaving Brooke once again to her work. She wanted someone to love but the person she wanted she could never have._

"Lindsey glad you feel that I am one with advice but me and relationships don't do so well."

Lindsey laughs. "Well you dated him how the hell you get into that head of his? I mean I tried but he closes me off."

"Ha I know what you mean. I thought things were going great."

"Yeah so I thought. I mean we have been dating for four years yet hasn't asked me to move in at all."

_Brooke was all too familiar with Lucas. He was a guy that is very rare to see yet Lucas had a hard time letting people in except Peyton. Brooke didn't want to see Lindsey get hurt._

"I've been where you are so I know how you feel. I never told anyone this so please don't tell a soul can you do that for me?" Lindsey nods her head. "I mean it not even Lucas can know you understand?!"

"Yes not a soul I promise."

Brooke takes a deep breath. "Are you sure because its important not to say a word especially to Lucas."

_Lindsey rolls her eyes taking a bite out of her salad she ordered. She could tell Brooke seemed paranoid with what she had to say._

"I promise now will you just tell me already."

_I didn't even know if I wanted to admit my feelings for Peyton to Lindsey. It would seem real and I don't know if I'm ready to know what it all means. I would have called Haley but she's friends with Lucas and I wouldn't know how she would react or if she would blurt it out to Lucas but why would Lucas care he has a great girl in his life now…but wait that never stopped him before now did it? Calm down Davis just tell her…everything will be just fine._

"Its about Peyton you see as you know her and I had our bad times than there are good times as well. You see I have been in love with my best friend…it was never about Lucas. Please don't tell him or anybody besides now that I've said it I think I need to excuse myself." Brooke says getting up from the table. "I'm sorry I'll talk to you later." She says leaving cash on the table.

"Brooke wait…sit back down I won't say a word." Lindsey says with a smile.

_Brooke mumbles something under her breath. She sat back down across from Lindsey. After revealing such a big thing all she wanted to do is get away and forget she even said anything._

"Have you ever told Peyton this?"

"Oh my god, NO!" Brooke says with a laugh. "I wish I could tell her but I can't."

"Why not?" Lindsey asked curiously. "Is it because your afraid of what Lucas might think…wait do you think the reason he hasn't asked me to move in with him because he's not over her?"

"See I won't answer that. Believe me I have been where you are but this time around I hope its different."

~Over in Los Angeles~

_I never thought I would stooped so low. I was able to get into one of those meetings. Of course they had to go with some bimbo with no talent. Seriously kids today need something to believe in and as for John and them its all about money._

"You know what John, I quit."

John smirks. "Where you going to go Peyton? Face it you need me you won't be able to find anybody better than us."

_Peyton smiles to herself walking away. Maybe she wouldn't find a better job than this but anything is better than what John has put her through the past four years._

"You know John I feel sorry for you because I thought you cared but its just about the dollar signs not even giving those artists who actually have something to say with their music. I promise you I will never back…I'm going home"

_Home? Where the hell is that exactly. I felt good standing up to them. I am going to start my own label but damn can't really do that…just great Sawyer your jobless._

_Peyton walked around all day till night soon fell. She came across Brooke Davis magazine. A smile appeared on her face. She missed her best friend. She dialed a number that was all too familiar but Brooke wasn't in the mood to answer it so she just let the answering machine take over. When a voice echoed the loft Brooke recognized it right away._

"Peyton hey…I'm here just got in." Brooke lies. "So how've you been?"

Peyton adjusts herself on the window sill. "Honestly I don't know Brooke. I quit my job but I called to see how you were doing. Your happy right? I mean your clothing line is doing so well I am very proud of you."

Brooke blushed. "Thank you wait you quit your job…P. Sawyer you love that job!!"

"Long story but something is missing." Peyton says looking down at the magazine she bought earlier. _*I wish I could tell you Brooke but I know you could never love me like t hat.* _She thought to herself. "Are you happy?" She asked repeating the question from earlier.

_I knew what Peyton is doing. it's a typical 'Peyton Sawyer' move. I have all that I have ever dreamed of but was I really happy? I could lie to her and say I am but she would see right through it._

"I should be happy. I am 'Brooke Davis fashion designer' I got everything I ever hoped for but its not like it was before. I miss my friends, I miss going out and not being hounded by people…I miss just being 'Brooke Davis'. Do you get what I'm saying. Does that make sense?"

Peyton sighs. "Makes all the sense in the world. I'm coming to New York B. Davis I miss my best friend."

Brooke smiles. "I miss you too P. Sawyer life isn't the same without you. I want a family like Nathan and Haley. I just want a life besides 'Clothes over Bros' do you think that is possible for me?"

"Anything is possible your Brooke Davis. Lucas said you would change the world and you did."

"Peyton?"

Peyton looking out the window. "yes?"

"Your first year in LA when Lucas came to visit you…why did you say no to his proposal?" Brooke asked curiously.

_I wasn't sure how to answer that question. It took me a moment to answer. I haven't really thought about it. I thought I could love Lucas forever at one point I did but I don't have those feelings anymore. I miss all of my friends even Lucas. I heard he was dating his editor. I'm happy for him really I am. He deserves happiness I don't know if I deserve it and if Brooke knew how I felt I would loose her._

_Brooke heard silence on the other end. She thought her friend hung up but she heard breathing so Brooke figured Peyton went off into her own thoughts. _

"Earth to Peyton! Did you hear what I said."

Peyton gets pulled out of her daze. "Yeah sorry um well it didn't feel right. He just wasn't right for me but I'm glad he moved on."

"Oh so you know?"

"yes I looked him up but I'm okay so I'll see you soon right?"

"Of course."

_Brooke looked at the time realizing just how late it was. She couldn't believe her conversation…Lucas wasn't for Peyton? Did that mean? Brooke didn't want to over think anything…after all they are just friends._

~Back in Tree Hill~

_Lucas dropped off his nephew back home. He needed someone to talk too about what to do with Lindsey. He was confused as to take the next step so maybe just maybe Nathan would talk some sense into him._

"Big brother you need to just go and ask her. You've been together around four years now, right?" Lucas nods his head. "So what are you waiting for?"

Lucas shrugs his shoulders. "I don't know afraid she'll say no. Been down that road before and don't really want a repeat of it."

Nathan laughs. "I doubt it if she's been around this long its safe to say she'll say yes. Be happy Lucas Scott and I better be best man."

Lucas smiles. "Alright I'll see you later man I got a call to make."

_Lindsey is laying down looking at a picture of her and Lucas. Suddenly her cell phone started to ring…it was Lucas._

Lindsey smiling. "Get any writing done yet?" She asked hopefully.

Lucas smiles with a laugh. "Actually I have but um just wondering if I could come see you I have some news to tell you."

Lindsey ponders a bit. "Well okay I suppose so…of course baby so when are you coming?"

"I'll be there in two days. I'll let you rest see you soon. I love you."

"I love you too."

_Lindsey hung up the phone smiling as did Lucas. Would he run into Peyton when he goes to see Lindsey? How will Peyton feel when she sees Lucas again? _

_To be continued….more to come soon with the next update. Brooke and Lucas talk and realize a lot of things. Peyton feels nothing for Lucas when she sees him again so what does that mean for Brooke? I guess I'll never tell maharaja tune into the next chapter and you will find out. _


	3. Revelation

A/N: thank you for the reviews and those who are reading. Here is another update. I am in the process of moving very soon so the updates may take awhile but don't worry once I get everything under control I will have update as soon as possible so hang in there.

Part 3

A FEW DAYS LATER…

_Lindsey and Brooke are waiting impatiently for people they couldn't wait to see at the airport. Brooke seemed to be more nervous than usual which Lindsey could tell._

"Brooke relax okay?" Brooke nodded her head. "You should tell her when you see her or maybe have a talk with Lucas." She suggested.

Brooke laughs to herself. "Um not a chance but someday I will." She says with a faint smile.

_I don't think I could ever tell Peyton how I feel because of the fact maybe she isn't over Lucas at all. Truth be told maybe he isn't over her neither and I would rather have Peyton as my best friend than loose her. I have become very close to Lindsey I don't want to see her get hurt…she really loves Lucas but does he love her the same way. I guess we will see once he sees Peyton again. Just than I see Peyton and Lucas walking off the plane. Lindsey beamed with joy once she saw her boyfriend walking towards her. I couldn't move at all. Seeing Peyton again I forgot just how beautiful she really is and she doesn't look that pale anymore she actually has more color not that it matter she still looks beautiful either way but my god she is so beautiful. Well don't just stand there Davis go and greet her or whatever your supposed to be doing right now._

Lucas twirls Lindsey off the ground. "Baby I have missed you so much." He says kissing her finally putting her down on her feet smiling like love sick puppy.

"I missed you too I'm glad you're here." Lindsey says with the same expression. _I hope this doesn't turn into any kind of tree hill drama I have heard so much about. Peyton is hot and the way I see her looking at Brooke right now I have feeling things are going to get tense between the two._

"Well P. Sawyer welcome to New York. How was your flight?" Brooke asked not sure why she was being so nervous around the blonde.

Peyton smiles. "It was alright but I couldn't wait to get off the plane." she says hugging her friend so hard. "I missed you B. Davis." _if she gets any closer than this I am tempted to just kiss her. Damn her and damn myself._

_The girls pull a part. Lucas, Lindsey, Peyton and Brooke just stood there in what seems to be an awkward silence. Peyton is the first to speak._

"Well you next to Lucas must be Lindsey." Lindsey nods her head. "I'm Peyton Sawyer so I see Lucas finally kept someone for longer than a few months."

Lucas laughs. "Very funny its going on four years but um since we all are just standing how about we all just grab our stuff and head out."

Brooke jumps in hugging her former boyfriend. "I agree…hmm Lindsey now I see why your with Lucas…he always had a nice body." She jokes.

_Everyone just rolls their eyes. Brooke skips as she carries Peyton's bags to the car. Lindsey walked along side Lucas. She couldn't help but smile at the couple. Brooke wanted that…she just wanted someone to kiss up on not that it was hard for her but the person she wanted is right near her and she can't seem find the courage to say anything except play the happy go lucky Brooke she always did. Peyton knew Brooke and behind that happy cheery face there was someone who had a lot on her shoulders._

"Well Brooke Davis you haven't said one word to me. Starting to think your mad at me or something." Lucas says walking into the room to find Brooke pacing the floor. "Are you okay?"

Brooke shrugs her shoulders. "I'm great and I am not mad. There is a lot on my mind is all. I hear you have something to tell Lindsey what is it? So help me Lucas Scott you hurt her I will kick your ass…"

Lucas cuts her off. "Chill its not like that I promise you but with the way your looking at Peyton I say something is up with you. You going to tell me or am I going to have to ask Lindsey."

Brooke glares at him. "How dare you think that something is up." She says defensively. "Look Lucas I'm sorry I didn't mean to snap at you. What is it you wanted?"

"Actually I needed to talk to you about why I am here." Lucas says than takes out a box to show Brooke. "What do you think? You think Lindsey will say yes."

_So this is why Lucas came to visit. _"Lucas she has stayed longer than Peyton and I ever did so the answer should be yes I don't see why not unless you seeing Peyton again brought back feelings again."

"You know Brooke I was afraid you would think that but honestly seeing Peyton again I thought I would have those feelings but I'm over it. What her and I had is really over…I am in love with Lindsey and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. Brooke I see the way you look at Peyton and the way Lindsey was acting when she saw the two of you I'm guessing she knows something that I don't…please Brooke you can tell me."

_I wasn't sure what Lucas was after or what the catch was. This is just the first day and already some drama is about to happen but Lucas doesn't seem so surprised maybe Lindsey did go behind my back and tell him. _

_Meanwhile Peyton and Lindsey are just sitting waiting for Lucas and Brooke to get done talking. _

"I guess I'll break this awkward silence. Lindsey right?" Lindsey nods her head. "You don't have to walk on egg shells with me I'm over him have been for years. I just am really happy he found someone and you seem like a good person."

Lindsey smiles. "Well that's a relief so you don't hate me or anything."

Peyton laughs. "No why would you think that for? Look I will admit yes I did love him but he just wasn't right for me and I hope you two work out because he deserves it unlike me well lets just I am unemployed and hope Brooke can give me a job."

"Oh what happened?"

"it's a long story really my boss is a douche bag so yeah I am here now." Peyton says not really sure what else to talk about. "Um Lindsey you have known Brooke for these past years how has she really been?"

"All I can say is since you walked off that plan I haven't seen her that happy in a long time." Lindsey says with smile.

_Lindsey is a good friend and I'm glad Brooke had someone like her but makes me jealous in a way because I missed out on a lot with Brooke. Maybe I should go and tell her how I feel._

"Lucas I don't know if I can because how you may feel. I can't loose her or you. I get we all have a long history together but these past four years you have been a great friend to me. Your about to ask the woman you love to marry you. Lucas I'm in love with Peyton…shit I don't think I should have said that." Brooke says panicking for what she just let slip out. "Sorry I didn't mean it like--"

_Lucas brings himself in front of Brooke smiling embracing her with a hug._

"Its okay I'm not mad I always have known that. Ever since high school even but I never brought myself to actually believe it was true. Only it hit me when she denied my proposal. I know she loved me but the person who has and always will have her heart is you Brooke Davis. Now I am not saying you should go and tell her but give it time and maybe while she is here you will see that she feels the same about you." Lucas says to Brooke. "Now come on they're probably thinking we are killing each other."

_Brooke couldn't help but laugh at that. She was relieved after her conversation with Lucas. Maybe she could tell Peyton after all but they both can be stubborn. Lucas whispered something to Lindsey smiling amongst themselves. Peyton looks over to Brooke wondering what that was about all Brooke could is shrug her shoulders._

_To be continued…sorry this part sucks but yeah this story doesn't have much to go. I wrote this off the top of my head so whatever is happening next is uncertain._


	4. Lets go home

A/N: This will be the last of this story. In the process of moving so I had to end this story quickly so I apologize for that. As far as my other stories go I have forgotten them but I will try to get an update with them before I move. Hope the ending to this is okay.

Part 4

_Do you want to know what it is they want? You._

_I want you._

_I am scared to say it out loud. You already know but in the back of my mind I think you don't care. I know you do silly me. But why is it I fear you? I fear of loving you and hating you._

_Relationships than ends and than you loose all that hope that you have. Will you love again you wonder?_

_And you do._

_********************************************_

_Having Peyton here is great its like having a piece of Tree Hill with me. Lucas and Lindsey have been urging me to tell Peyton how I feel but I always chicken out every time we're alone. My mother has taken an interest in my life but isn't so surprised about my feelings for Peyton. Its odd its like she actually cares for me and wants me to be happy. I love you Peyton Sawyer…my best friend god I really do but I wish I could tell her._

"For the last time Lindsey I can't go up and just tell her how I feel. You don't know Peyton as well as I do…Lucas come on you know from personal experience she pushes away look what she did to you back in high school."

"Yeah but this isn't high school anymore. We all have grown up and I think Lindsey here is right I saw the way she looked at you she does feel the same way. Your both just too stubborn to admit it to each other."

Brooke rolls her eyes. "Yeah your just agreeing with her because your getting married." She says sarcastically. "Just please don't put pressure on me because I have plenty of that already."

_Lindsey says something to Lucas leaving the two girls alone. He hoped this talk would help her._

"Look when Peyton comes back from the store just ask to talk to her. You thought Lucas would freak and he obviously knew. I get this is complicated but it don't have to be. When your in love with Brooke you just have to take that risk because your always going to wonder what if. Maybe Peyton is waiting for you to say something first."

"Of course she is but I just can't…what is it with you people I just can't tell her I don't want to loose her."

"You can't know that god you are very stubborn just take that stick out your ass Brooke. Lucas and I see the way you two look at one another. Really you both are just too damn stubborn and I can't just sit and watch you both struggle with whatever the hell your trying to avoid."

"I'm not avoiding anything." Brooke says defensively.

"Yes you are your avoiding getting your heartbroken again. After all the stuff you two went through you really believe she won't feel the same way?"

"Truthfully I feel that she does but she likes guys and stuff. I don't know what to do…this is all still new to me and I am just trying to figure it all out."

"what is there really to figure out? You love her don't you so just go and tell her."

_Meanwhile Peyton seemed to find her way throughout New York. She wasn't expecting to bump into Lucas. She really didn't want to talk to him right now…she just wanted to be alone but that wasn't going to happen._

"Lucas shouldn't you be planning your wedding. Where's Lindsey?" Peyton asked walking along side her ex.

Lucas smiles. "She's with Brooke so um I am actually glad we are alone I need to ask you something."

_Oh please not right now Lucas. I can't deal with you. _"Oh sure um do you want to sit down. I have been walking around all day."

_Peyton and Lucas walk over to a near by bench. It took a minute for Lucas to say something. They have been through a lot together and even though he has moved on he still cared for his lover. He just wanted her to be happy and if that meant being with Brooke well he would do anything to make them see that themselves. Peyton had no idea what Lucas is up too and this whole run in seemed to have been on purpose. Lindsey and Lucas were up to something which she couldn't quite figure it out._

"What do you want Lucas?" Peyton asked sounding a little harsher than she wanted.

"Just to talk and wondering why you haven't told Brooke how you feel?"

Peyton glares at him. "I have no idea what your talking about."

Lucas raised an eyebrow. "The way you used to look at me is how you look at Brooke when you think nobody is looking. You two have been best friends for years so if that is what is stopping your being selfish. You deserve to be happy Peyton. I will always love you but we weren't meant to be. I seen it back than and I see it now too much time has passed by you really going to just let her go or are you going to see what could be?"

"Um Lucas I really have no idea what to say."

"Just say your going to tell her how you feel? The wedding is going to be in Tree Hill. I'll let you be now have to go and pick up Lindsey going to have dinner see you later." Lucas says hugging his friend. "Go and be happy with who your heart desires." He whispers getting up to walk away.

_Peyton is left alone with her thoughts once again. She had no idea what to do at this point. Maybe she could tell her the one and only Brooke Davis risking a ten plus years friendship or have it to where the person she cares for most knows just how much she means to them. Brooke was relieved when Lucas came by to pick up Lindsey. She loves the way her life is but what was missing is love…she wanted that._

_I have been contemplating on what Lucas and Lindsey have said to be the past few weeks. This is all overwhelming and I even had a good talking too from Victoria. Since when does she want her daughter to be happy. She even suggested I open a store in Tree Hill and try to see where Peyton and I could go. She is actually encouraging me to tell Peyton how I feel…this is Victoria Davis my mother! Could anything get any weirder…oh wait it did got a call from Haley and Nathan inviting us to Jaime's birthday party. Haven't seen him since he was a baby. Lucas must have told them because without so much words Haley encouraged me to follow my heart. Not living in Tree Hill yet it seems to always follow me around._

_Peyton walked out of the bedroom with her hair done up. Out of her usual style clothes Brooke's mouth dropped when she saw what she was wearing. It was a nice styled red and black dress that revealed such things Brooke has imagined in her mind. A blush appeared on Brooke's face starring a little too long at her friend which caused Peyton to blush._

"Alright B. Davis so what do you think? Is it too much?" Peyton asked nervously.

"Its perfect." Brooke says with a big smile on her face. "You look beautiful."

Peyton blushes. "So before we go I have something to tell you." Brooke bashes her eyes causing Peyton to laugh. "Its just going to be us for dinner…I told Lindsey and Lucas that we should be alone I hope you don't mind."

_Oh god alone is she trying to tell me something. _"I don't mind at all but why are your bags packed?"

"I was thinking we can go home. You know you can have clothes over bros in Tree Hill and we can move in together?" She asked hopefully.

"Why P. Sawyer are you saying what I think your saying?"

Peyton fiddles her hands. "yeah um not good at this so what do you say? Do you want to try and see where this takes us?"

_Brooke leaned towards Peyton wrapping her arms around Peyton. She kissed her not sure if Peyton would freak out but she didn't. the kiss was brought into a deeper passionate one. When both girls broke a part they had silly little smiles on their faces. _

"come on P. Sawyer lets go home." Brooke says wrapping her arms around Peyton's waist.

"I love you B. Davis."

"I love you too P. Sawyer now come on Blondie you going soft on me?" Brooke asked with a smirk.

"Only for you doll."

_With that the two girls were heading back home to tree Hill. Lucas and Lindsey got married no less than two months later. Everyone is getting used to the idea of Brooke and Peyton together but they were happy and that is all that mattered to everyone. Love can take a turn for the worst or for the better for Brooke and peyton it has been a long time coming. Throughout all the drama there is a sweet silver lining and the two best friends turned lovers found that._

_The end_

_Okay is that the best ending to the story but this is what I came up with so sorry if its lame and dumb. _


End file.
